Thursday, 21 January 2010

The truth behind the Belle Mere situation

The art of giving or how very spoilt and horrid I really am.

Along came Erbie, The GR wanted to make a will – just incase, so asked (as a precaution) even though he thought, had been told, had been promised, the flat was his, for 49% of the deeds to be put into our names. This had been an ongoing discussion at the behest of Belle Mere for 8 years at least ‘I should really put your name on the deeds, it’s yours in my will…, get a laywer, find out about capital gains tax for me etc. etc’. She charged us rent for living there anyway so when we ran away to France we rented it out which provided an income for the Belle Mere and The GR. Then we moved back and decided to rent in the West End for a while, which the flat supplemented. Then the Belle Mere decided to move back to London and into the flat. After almost another year of negotiations she produced a printed list of reasons she didn’t want to put our names on the deeds, it was, for The GR, the last straw, we withdrew and silence fell.

If she was a nice, decent person she would have just given the flat to The GR when she bought it (for him) with money she had inherited 15 years ago (so that he’d have somewhere to live whilst studying). She didn’t need the money then and doesn’t need it now. Is she afraid that if she gives the flat to The GR he won’t have to put up with her anymore, the absolute opposite would be the case. It would be such a lovely thing to have done, he would probably do anything for her, which he more or less had done up until the point he realised she’d been stringing him along for all these years. Rewarding his brother’s bad behaviour and reprimanding him for his good. We’d be forever in her debt, and would joyfully put up with whatever demands she made, because of the wonderful gift.

Instead it’s been about the money, the power of it. Holding things at ransome, offering things, then retracting. Making promises one year and denying them a year later. Setting up hopes to dash them. She owns 2 properties outright, and has savings, it’s her money she can do what the devil she likes with it and it seems she will. I guess to some people material wealth is worth more than spiritual. I know which I’d rather have and now it seems just aswell I do.

Now how horrid and spoilt do you think me – no comments please!


Marie said...

I don't think you horrid or spoilt at all. The points you make are so sensible, why promise something only to withdraw it. And the rewards of behaviour happens only too often. Hopefully some resolve will come of this sometime and perhaps the best resolve of just getting the flat :)

Nobody Girl said...

I don't think you're at all spoilt. I think it sounds like she's playing games with you both and that's just not fair.

Metropolitan Mum said...

Brrr. This sounds all too familiar to me. With the difference that it has been my family, not his.

Other nonsense

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