Monday 26 October 2015

Anxiety dreams

Dreampt I saw a young girl with a platinum blonde bob pushing a pram up the garden path to our front door, I asked if she was Vera. She walked past me, I asked her again if she was Vera the new owner of the garden flat, she continued to ignore me. The door to the garden flat was propped open with dust sheets on the ground and I followed her in. The entrance hallway was huge, like a ballroom, it was full of young girls, they all stared at me. I tried to follow Vera but lost sight of her, in the end I asked where she had gone, no one seemed to understand me, everyone was whispering and staring at me, someone pointed into another room next to the garden. I asked if anyone spoke English again and a young girl pointed to a huge swarthy guy with long dark hair stood next to a large window. I asked him what work they were planning to do, he didn’t answer me either. I said I lived here and was one of the joint freeholders and that they were not to do any structural work without consent and that we had a right to see the plans. He wouldn’t look me in the eye but sniggered and said: I know, we are taking them to court’.  I felt he was too angry to look at me. I went to leave but the corridor back to the front door had sunk 5ft. To get out I had to pull out shelves as makeshift stairs to climb, up all the girls were looking at me and I was trying to make idle chit chat saying:, Gosh, I couldn’t do this every day.‘ ‘How do you do this everyday?‘ ‘How does Vera do this with a pram?‘

So it would appear I’m not only afraid of impending structural work but losing my youth, large dark men and prams - I know I’ve always had a dislike for prams, I guess the others are no surprise either.

I took Erbie to Highgate Woods yesterday, the Autumn colours were beautiful, the sun hung low in the sky and there was a slight chill in the air. We met a friend from school in the playground and I spoke to his parents, who had helped me come up with the line: ‘None of this is acceptable;’ when we’d been asked to sign two consent forms, one for future building work to go ahead (without seeing any plans) and the second for the historical removal of the chimney breasts in the garden flat, (that had been carried out before we owned a part of the building).

They told me not to worry - no one could do anything structural to the building without agreement from the leaseholders / freeholders.  I asked: ‘What do I do if they know that but go ahead and do it anyway, can we stop them?’ They said if you hear a wall being knocked down or see lots of rubble coming out you’ll know they’re up to something and can get a solicitor involved. They also told me there is a free drop-in session for planning advice with Haringey council in Wood Green.

Please let it be nice people that move in.


I plan to hoover the communal hallway and sweep up the communal front path today, as I am working from home, a little territorial scenting perhaps...

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‘They tuck you up your mum and dad...’
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Anais Nin

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Eliza Doolittle